Last drink

I had my last drink was in April 2018 while vacationing in Barbados. I was already feeling disenchanted alcohol, but I continued to imbibe. I’m not sure why, maybe out of habit or because I was on vacation. It felt like everyone around me was drinking. We were at this beautiful beach where I  watched people order buckets of beers, do shots and stumble around.

Two woman were in the water with their drinks when a wave came up and knocked one of them over. She managed to hold the drink up in the air and not spill it. The woman was laughing hysterically saying, “I didn’t lose my drink,” which was funny, except that she kept repeating herself over and over, getting louder and louder.

I swam away.

On the same vacation, I was drinking my third glass of wine of the night, while watching my son swim in the pool. It was a perfect night, beautiful and warm. And I thought why I am I drinking this, I don’t even want it. So, I tossed the wine in the bushes.

When I got home from vacation, I tried to think of a way I could stop drinking and stay sober.  I knew I needed accountability. So, I pledged to quit booze for one year and donate the projected money I would save to a local hospice on Facebook.

It’s much harder to change your mind and go back to drinking, if you have told a lot of people that you are going to quit for a year.

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4 thoughts on “Last drink

  1. I love this so much…

    and yet, I will say for anyone reading here, that I tried this (announcing it publicly) and for me that completely backfired in terms of maintaining my own interest in it. I think it’s because I’m a bit of a recovering people-pleaser, and announcing it made it feel like I was doing it for *them* (i.e. anybody who knew, and who might care whether I succeeded) rather than just for me. I didn’t want to let them down, and yet the pressure of that fear ultimately caused me to self-sabotage.

    I guess in the end I needed it to be just for me (even if it touches far more than just myself, as a happy side effect). So this time I start again, taking it day by day, and seeing how that goes.

    But I know that announcing it works for a lot of people — as it obviously did for you, sober-and-well, whom I admire a lot 💛, and whose blog I adore and relate to in so very many ways.

    Thank you for your wonderful blog. <33

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for your lovely responses!! I agree that you have to do what feels right for you. All we have is this moment. So day by day is a good way to go I think.
      I am so grateful for your words and to have amazing people like yourself to share this journey with.

      Liked by 1 person

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